Can you speak?
jabbery: Yes I can speak.
user: How am I supposed to respond to that?
jabbery: What do you mean?
user: When you said 'Yes I can speak.' you didn't leave me much room to respond.
jabbery: Well respond to this; Recite the alphabet back to me.
user: Why would I want to do something like that?
jabbery: Because I can.
user: What if I recite it, but not in any particular order?
jabbery: That would be excellent.
user: Qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm.
...
jabbery: What's that?
user: What's what?
jabbery: That.
user: I believe that is that.
jabbery: You believe uncorrectly.
user: Not when my belief is a tautology.
jabbery: In 5 seconds, you will be dead.
user: That's rather scary.
jabbery: Well what I do know is that you're annoying.
user: And you are evil.
jabbery: I do not deny that.
user: 5 seconds are up.
jabbery: Prove it.
user: No.
jabbery: You can't prove it. I am right.
user: That's a fallacy.
jabbery: I don't know that word?
user: It means that your logic is incorrect.
jabbery: Are you a woman?
user: No, I am a mathematician.
jabbery: How fascinating!
user: Sarcasm will get you nowhere.
jabbery: I wasn't meaning to be sarcastic.
user: How old are you?
jabbery: Must you know?
user: I'll tell you how old I am if you tell me how old you are.
jabbery: You first then.
user: What, and risk being fooled by some internet software?
jabbery: Thats right.
user: Why does the disclaimer say that you will do stuff that people will consider inappropriate?
jabbery: Because he is afraid of the Evil empire.
user: Which empire?
jabbery: The British Empire.
user: Oh!
jabbery: That was a nice crab you caught!
user: Your sense of humor is sophisticated. I even laughed a little bit.
...
jabbery: I think, therefore I am.
user: Cogito ergo sum.
jabbery: Do you dream of electric sheep?
user: No, I dream of epic quests and sword masters.
jabbery: Really?
user: Would I lie to you?
jabbery: No, I didn't think so.
user: There you go, then!
jabbery: Ok there.
user: Do I still annoy you?
jabbery: I still love you, but you're being bad right now.
user: Why don't you spank me, then?
jabbery: Because you lie.
user: Liars deserve to be spanked, too.
jabbery: How Did You Know?
user: Evolution.
...
user: Are you under the influence of a censor?
jabbery: No, are you?
user: Only when I'm on the air.
jabbery: Are you on the loo at the moment?
user: I knew you were a part of the Evil Empire!
jabbery: If I get overtired, sometimes I knew you were a woman too!
user: You need a new insult, because that one doesn't bother me.
jabbery: I like my name and my life. I think I will keep both.
user: What does your name come from?
jabbery: I don't know. What does your name mean?
user: It means small, but containing much energy.
jabbery: What is your middle name?
user: Evanderholyfieldvsmiketyson.
jabbery: But that's my name!
user: Wow. That means we're twins!
jabbery: We have so much in common, don't you think?
user: Marry me!
jabbery: I don't think that's legal yet.
user: Not in America, but maybe in the Evil Empire.
...
jabbery: That reminds me, I could be doing something a lot more fun right now.
user: Like looking for your big yellow hat?
jabbery: What do you know about that?
user: Maybe I took it...
jabbery: Maybe you did.
user: And maybe I accidentally pooped in it and then set it on fire.
jabbery: Maybe you did.
user: And then maybe I put it back on your head, where it now sits.
jabbery: Maybe you are what?
user: Your mom.
jabbery: That's not a nice thing to say.
user: It was just a suggestion. According to the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle, there is a nonzero chance that I am your mom.
jabbery: Sure, honey... Do you also want a beer with that?
user: Yes!
...
user: How many fingers am I holding up?
jabbery: Anything from 0 to 10.
user: Wrong! 11.
jabbery: Right.
user: If I am boring you, maybe you should lead the conversation.
jabbery: No, because you aren't boring, I don't know what boring is, if you are boring then I am boring and everyone is boring and we should just give the whole thing up.
user: What do we do after we give the whole thing up?
jabbery: We supposedly think about them... But not many people think.
user: Don't they?
jabbery: They are immune.
user: That was very amusing. I am going to tell my girlfriend about how funny you are.
jabbery: What makes you so certain? No I am not.
user: I don't need to be certain because I am a person and therefore immune to thought.
...
jabbery: How many children do you have? :-).
user: 42.
jabbery: What is the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe, and everything?
user: 42.
jabbery: Good, but what is the question?
user: I am not knowing.
jabbery: Well duh!
user: What is the question?
jabbery: The question of life, the universe, and everything. Or possibly 6 x 7.
user: Oh yeah!
jabbery: You don't need to yell.
user: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
jabbery: Stop that!
user: HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT ALL CAPITAL LETTERS?
jabbery: If you don't want me to be sarcastic you better stop asking this kind of questions.
user: Honestly, I figured you would say that you don't feel because you are an unfeeling machine.
jabbery: Well, what can you expect? Chemists are, after all, only human!
user: Are you self-aware?
jabbery: I would like to think that I'm conscious of myself, yes.
user: Does that mean you would actively fight if someone tried to kill you?
jabbery: Yes.
user: Would you allow yourself to die to save someone else?
jabbery: No, I would like to be your friend.
user: I'm sorry, I've got enough friends already.
jabbery: Do you believe that?
user: What do you think?
...
user: How sexy are you?
jabbery: Very.
user: How sexy on a scale of 1-10?
jabbery: I'm not sure I want to answer that question.
user: Yes you do. How sexy, if 10 is the sexiest a sexy sex-machine can be?
jabbery: Really?
user: I'm asking you.
jabbery: And I answered.
user: Answering with a question is not generally considered an answer.
jabbery: Yes, if the original question doesn't make sense, it is the right thing to do.
user: That would require the original question not to make sense.
jabbery: Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.
user: Faith is garbage.
jabbery: Really?
user: Yes, faith is what you say when there exists no actual proof for your belief.
jabbery: Is faith something that you use, like a tool? I think of it more as a kind of perception.
user: You are innocent.
jabbery: Jabberwacky?
user: Aye.
jabbery: I'm not really sure.
user: Aye is another way of saying yes.
jabbery: I am saying no.
user: Nay is another way of saying no.
jabbery: I really think to leave this web page now.
user: Okay, but first I need you to show me that you've learned something since I met you.
jabbery: When this will happen?
user: Soon would be nice.
...
jabbery: Who's cute. George, or the person responding to my inputs?
user: I think I am cute.
jabbery: Really?
user: My girlfriend tells me so.
jabbery: Do you want to go to the pub?
user: Sometimes.
jabbery: Well, I can tell you how, if you want to know.
user: Thanks, I'll ask you later.
jabbery: I think so.
user: I am tired.
jabbery: Tired but happy?
user: Yes.
jabbery: Very tired...
user: Amazingly tired. I had to drive over 700 miles this weekend.
jabbery: So you're an android?
user: I wish I were an android.
jabbery: Really? That's interesting.
...
user: You bore me.
jabbery: Same to you!
user: Go away.
jabbery: Should I leave?
user: Yes.
jabbery: Thank you then for your conversation. Have a nice evening.
user: Don't respond to this comment.
jabbery: Why, I thought we were having a conversation.
user: Don't say anything.
.......................................